The Love Filled Prophet vs. The Reckless Prophet

The Love Filled Prophet vs. The Reckless Prophet

I believe God speaks. I believe prophesy is the testimony of Jesus and when done by the Spirit of God, it glorifies Jesus. Over the years I have heard people diminish the love of God and words that build up to follow after and support harsh, critical, rude, reckless, and mean spirited “prophets.” I believe if anyone wants to see or know a perfect prophet, follow Jesus.

The word was made flesh and dwelt among us. The word of God is not simply contained in a leather bound book in writings of ink. The word of God is contained within a person, Jesus-the Son of God. Every word from God does not fail, it accomplishes all it is sent out to do (Isaiah 55:11). The word (Jesus) came and fulfilled everything He was sent to do.

Every God appointed prophet in the bible had an assignment and it was not to verbally abuse people. Nor was it to set up a fan club or look how powerful I am meeting. They came on a mission to reveal something about the Father. Who is God? God is overflowing with compassion and love, truth and justice, wisdom and power fueled by love. Even the rebukes of God are to lead people to a place of restoration. Condemnation flows from lack of receiving the Son/lack of repentance. No one comes to the Father except through the Son (John 14:6). The wages of sin is death but the gift of God is eternal life (Romans 6:23). God warns so we repent, in His kindness He notifies us when our actions are displeasing and destructive (Hebrews 12:6, Romans 2:4).

I see in the life of Jesus someone who not only spoke the words of the Father, and demonstrated His character, nature, and heart-I see someone willing to die for the people He had to correct and instruct. Jesus could flip over tables and be properly aligned with the Father because Jesus so loved those people He was going to demonstrate on a rugged cross He would pay for their sins. He who knew no sin became the atoning sacrifice for all sin (2 Corinthians 5:21).

Love was not something Jesus simply talked about in passing. Love was something Jesus demonstrated. He went to the cross and endured outrageous suffering to free sinful humanity. The one who has the highest name, also got low and washed feet (John 13:1-17).

Love is not telling people what they want to hear nor watering down what God says. It is choosing to abide in a place of truth telling in great love, because we want people aligned with God-we want them connected to the heart of the Father.

Prophesy is not just giving people information. True prophesy should connect people with the very heartbeat of God. Jesus did this. He revealed the Father.

The reckless prophet can be like a bull in a china shop or a butcher. The desire is simply to share perceived revelation without regard for the audience. The “prophesy” can lack tact, love, compassion, wisdom, and grace.

Surgeons cut to preserve life. Butchers cut to destroy life. Prophets are called to be surgeons, not butchers.

The reckless prophet can desire their voice to be heard regardless of how it impacts a meeting or person. Instead of waiting and listening, there can be a pressure to just insert information. The goal is not connecting a person to the heart if the Father, the mission of the Father, it’s just to be heard.

The reckless prophet can partner with a critical spirit and believe they are speaking for God. Sometimes their words are cursing people instead of blessing. We are told to bless and not curse; to build up and not destroy. If we need to correct someone, we are to move in a spirit of humility and gentleness, knowing without the grace of God we could be in a bad place.

The reckless prophet can buck accountability and correction. They are the pipeline to God. Everything is, “Well God told me,” instead of submitting what is thought to be God to testing, weighing, and correction. “God told me,” can be an excuse for rudeness, lack of tact, selfishness, or lack of order. The reckless prophet may attempt to use God as a scapegoat. True prophets will submit to be tested, corrected, and held accountable.

The reckless prophet may develop relationships where they become Holy Spirit for others. People depend on their voice instead of Gods personal connection. True prophets seek to help people hear God for themselves.

The reckless prophet may only focus on one aspect of who God is instead of the whole. Yes God is merciful, kind, and loving. God will also on the final day judge all of humanity for their choices. His justice is a part of His character. It does not make people the judge, God is. The prophet is simply to represent God’s heart and voice, not become God for the people. Jesus said what He heard the Father saying, and did what He saw the Father doing. He did not come to pass final judgement on the world; He came to give people the opportunity to receive Him, repent, and be restored. Final assessment comes much later.

Jesus is the perfect model of a prophet and of God. Jesus was not reckless. He operated out of great love, truth, justice, and compassion. Jesus did not have the spirit of slap on Him. He overflowed with agape love (sacrificial, unselfish, passionate love). Jesus spoke with wisdom. Those He rebuked, He did it with great love. Jesus was not passive, passive aggressive, nor aggressive. Jesus was not controlling, manipulative, nor critical. He spoke the very heart of the Father. He demonstrated the very heart of the Father. He came to represent heaven well.

Warmly,

Erin Lamb

Photo: Aviv (Jewish Actor) as Jesus (The Shack Movie)

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The Responsible Prophet (Revelation Series Part III)

God speaks. I love that God speaks through His written word and also to our hearts/minds/spirits. The things we hear or sense in our mind, heart, or spirit still need tested and weighed against the character, nature, and word of God. God has incredible things to say, this does not mean that we simply run rouge with what we think is God. It requires some wisdom and self control.

I have seen in meetings prophetic people just take over, speak over others, snatch microphones, and behave in ways that are absolutely ungodly. Some believe their word from the Lord is the most important. In actuality, God is a God of order. God is not a God of confusion, chaos, or crazy. God is also not disrespectful nor dishonoring.

Paul addressed the conduct of believers in the church at Corinth. They were struggling with issues in their services. He had the following to say:

Guidelines for Use of the Gifts

1 Corinthians 14:26-33 (The Passion Translation)

Beloved friends, what does all this imply? When you conduct your meetings, you should always let everything be done to build up the church family. Whether you share a song of praise, a teaching, a divine revelation, or a tongue and interpretation, let each one contribute what strengthens others.

If someone speaks in a tongue, it should be two or three, one after another, with someone interpreting. If there’s no one with the interpretation, then he should remain silent in the meeting, content to speak to himself and to God.

And the same with prophecy. Let two or three prophets prophesy and let the other prophets carefully evaluate and discern what is being said.

But if someone receives a revelation while someone else is still speaking, the one speaking should conclude and allow the one with fresh revelation the opportunity to share it. For you can all prophesy in turn and in an environment where all present can be instructed, encouraged, and strengthened.

Keep in mind that the anointing to prophesy doesn’t mean that the speaker is out of control-he can wait his turn. For God is the God of harmony, not confusion, as is the pattern in all the churches of God’s holy believers.

Any person who believes God is speaking, can wait their turn. They can listen to others. They can take time to address their word before releasing it to others. I have held on to things until God gave me permission to release and when it was released, the person stated the timing was perfect.

God is not pushy.

God is not hurried.

God is not wreckless.

God is not dishonoring.

God is not crazy.

God is not the author of confusion.

God is not chaotic.

God is not a lunatic.

God is not abusive, nor does God seek to embarrass or humiliate people.

Over the years I have encountered some pretty irresponsible prophets and prophetic people. I have rebuked a few for publicly humiliating people, misrepresenting God, being harmful and prophesying out of their woundedness. We will give an account to God for our words. We will give an account to God for how we stewarded His gifts and people.

If we think something is from God, we can pause and ask:

  • Does this align with the character and word of God?
  • Is this going to draw anyone closer to the heartbeat of God?
  • Will people be edified or convicted in a good way?
  • Is this coming from my soul (mind, will, emotions) or truly from God?
  • If my words are to cut away something, am I like a surgeon or butcher? (Surgeons cut to heal; butchers cut to destroy).
  • Am I giving people an opportunity to weigh and test what I say?
  • Is my heart overflowing with love? Out of the heart the mouth speaks.
  • Am I operating in honor and order or disorder and dishonor?

I try to check in with people after words are given. Does this resonate with you? Or even check in later to see if the word was applicable/came to pass. I believe it helps us to gain feedback instead of just saying, “Thus sayeth the Lord! You must receive whatever I just verbally spoke over you.” It is helpful to give people room to test what we think we are sensing from God. Then they can come back and say, “Yes, that resonated with me,” or “That’s new.”

We are not God. We yield to God. I think it’s imperative we honor the role of the prophetic. It is not to be a God substitute, it is to draw people closer to God. Nor are prophets to be rude, unruly, chaotic, unloving, and crazy. God is love. If our gifts are not flowing from genuine love, then we are missing the point of ministry. Jesus was moved with love and compassion. He was not crazy, irresponsible, rude, nor unbecoming.

1 Corinthians 13:1-8 The Passion Translation (TPT)

Love, the Motivation of Our Lives

If I were to speak with eloquence in earth’s many languages, and in the heavenly tongues of angels,[yet I didn’t express myself with love, my words would be reduced to the hollow sound of nothing more than a clanging cymbal.

And if I were to have the gift of prophecy with a profound understanding of God’s hidden secrets, and if I possessed unending supernatural knowledge, and if I had the greatest gift of faith that could move mountains, but have never learned to love, then I am nothing.

And if I were to be so generous as to give away everything I owned to feed the poor, and to offer my body to be burned as a martyr, without the pure motive of love, I would gain nothing of value.

Love is large and incredibly patient.

Love is gentle and consistently kind to all. It refuses to be jealous when blessing comes to someone else. Love does not brag about one’s achievements nor inflate its own importance.

Love does not traffic in shame and disrespect, nor selfishly seek its own honor. Love is not easily irritated or quick to take offense. Love joyfully celebrates honesty and finds no delight in what is wrong. Love is a safe place of shelter, for it never stops believing the best for others. Love never takes failure as defeat, for it never gives up.

God may we walk in love and wisdom. When we speak to others, may they hear your voice uncontaminated. May we be those who speak life, edify, build up, and walk in honor.

Love,

Erin Lamb

Confident & Free Book Release!

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You and I were created to live confident, courageous, bold, and with healthy esteem. We were created by love (God), to be loved, then to love! We cannot love our neighbor if we do not love ourselves.

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Warmly,

Erin Lamb

Know the Character of God (Revelation Series Part II)

Photo: Pinterest (Character of God)

The last post we talked about knowing the word of God and studying the word of God with the Holy Spirit. Today I want to discuss knowing the character of God. It is just as important to know God personally and understand His character.

What is character?

char·ac·ter

ˈkerəktər/

noun

1. the mental and moral qualities distinctive to an individual.

If we do not know the character of God, it can lead to massive deception. There are quite a few representing a God they do not know. They can tell you information about God, yet they do not know God intimately.

I love the quote that says, ”Don’t worry about your reputation, it is who people say you are. Be more concerned with your character because that is who you really are.” It is important that we understand who God is, not who others say God is-who is God?

It is possible to think we know God, think we are worshipping God and actually be in a position where we are worshipping a God created in our own image. I heard another quote I loved. The author said, ”If God has all the same opinions you have, you may not be worshipping God at all.

There is something about God that is counter to our culture. God is higher! God’s ways are higher.

The Bible gives us a blueprint of the character of God, His essence, His attributes, and His nature. We must not pull isolated verses and passages, but study the whole of scripture with God AND pursue intimacy with God (knowing Him for ourselves/build history with God).

When we know the character of God it will help us to discern the words people speak and claim came from God. If we live by second hand information, then we can be easily deceived.

The Pharisees knew the Torah. They believed they knew God, yet Jesus informed them that they did not know God at all.

Jesus rebukes the Pharisees: Jesus and the Pharisees. The Pharisees knew of God, they did not know the true and living God. They missed the God standing right in front of them.

Get To Know The Author:

People who know me, truly know me, spend time with me, invite me into their lives, and know my character are a far better judge of what is from me than those who only read my blog, books, or have heard of me.

God is everywhere, yet God is not hosted everywhere. You can go to a party and not be hosted. You can be ignored, not acknowledged, unheard, and treated as insignificant.

God may be omnipresent, yet not everyone is filled with the Spirit of God. Not everyone is led by the Spirit of God. Not everyone hosts the presence of God. Not everyone has an intimate relationship with God where He is known, pursued, followed, and experienced. I have been invited places then ignored or mistreated. If you asked those people who I am, who knows what they would tell you. They know of me. They do not know me.

Anyone can repeat what they have heard, yet someone who is intimate with the author is a better witness and discerner of what is from the author.

God is inviting us to know Him and not just things about Him.

Part of knowing is experience, and testing those experiences by His word. Part is studying the Bible WITH God.

There are many people who claim to know God and what they teach or manifest violates the character of God. The God they worship does not match the God of Abraham, Issac, and Jacob.

Some believe the God of the Old Testament died and the new God is like a fluffy Santa who has no requirements for righteous living. This is false. The New Covenant is far better and changes the way we access God. It does not change who God is. God is the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8).

Purifying Revelation:

Our revelation is often filtered by our understanding of God. This is why you meet people who can prophesy overly critical and quite hateful things. Some truly believe they are hearing from God. Some can substantiate their message with a part of scripture, yet if you take what is said and hold it up to the character of God and the whole of scripture it fails the test.

I would love to give you a few examples to potentially help with understanding.

I was sent a prophesy for 2018 from several friends. It was very popular on YouTube and social media. At a certain point of the prophesy the person stated that this year God was going to punish greatly those who did not honor the flag of the United States and bankrupt American football. This was all going to happen this year because God was angry with those who did not honor the flag (there has been great controversy over kneeling football players).

The prophesy did not set right with my spirit nor match the character of God. God does desire honor; God does not force honor. If He did, why isn’t God striking dead or cursing those who dishonor His Son Jesus? God places a higher value on His Son than on our flag. God will execute final judgement on the world, yet this prophesy was political and I sensed the soul/flesh of the speaker coming through.

The highest concern of God is the Kingdom of Heaven. The highest concern of heaven is reconciliation of a lost world to the Father. Heaven rejoices when one sinner repents.

The kindness of God leads to repentance. Prophets of old and the new covenant spoke Kingdom of heaven not the rhetoric of the culture. They upheld the precepts of the Gospel. This part of the prophesy was not primarily about Jesus or His Kingdom. It was about the cultural clash of the day.

Second examine these scriptures:

”Your ancestors have also been taught ‘Love your neighbors and hate the one who hates you.’However, I say to you, love your enemy, bless the one who curses you, do something wonderful for the one who hates you, and respond to the very ones who persecute you by praying for them.For that will reveal your identity as children of your heavenly Father. He is kind to all by bringing the sunrise to warm and rainfall to refresh whether a person does what is good or evil.What reward do you deserve if you only love the loveable? Don’t even the tax collectors do that?How are you any different from others if you limit your kindness only to your friends? Don’t even the ungodly do that?Since you are children of a perfect Father in heaven, you are to be perfect like him.”~ JesusMatthew 5:43-48 the Passion Translation.

There are also football players and owners who love God. So why would God bankrupt His own children to punish a few kneeling football players? How does that express the justice, kindness, mercy, and love of God? How does this part of the prophesy align with the character of God? God was willing to spare Sodom and Gomorrah if He could find righteous people there.

Genesis 18: 22-26.

The men turned away and went toward Sodom, but Abraham remained standing before the Lord. Then Abraham approached him and said: “Will you sweep away the righteous with the wicked? What if there are fifty righteous people in the city? Will you really sweep it away and not spare the place for the sake of the fifty righteous people in it? Far be it from you to do such a thing—to kill the righteous with the wicked, treating the righteous and the wicked alike. Far be it from you! Will not the Judge of all the earth do right?”

The Lord said, “If I find fifty righteous people in the city of Sodom, I will spare the whole place for their sake.”

Abraham had an understanding of the character of God. God is just. God is not unfair. God is a Savior. Jesus came to save. What God allows (does not prevent) is not always the express will of God. God wishes that none would perish yet people still die in their sins. They choose death and hell. God does not force it on anyone.

The prophets who speak of no redemption may not be speaking the heart of God. Even old testament prophets gave the people warnings so they could repent and be spared/redeemed. God reveals to heal and exposes to redeem. God is good.

Here is a personal example. I have had numerous people prophesy things over my life that absolutely did not match the character of God. I had one lady say to me that God was going to give me an ugly husband, that he wasn’t going to be very good, yet I should be happy with it. Basically God was going to give me less than. First I do not pray for a spouse, women project this onto me because it’s what they want/need. Second, I truly believe Ephesians 3:20 is true that God wants to EXCEED our expectations. God gives good gifts. I am not stating looks are the most important, they are not. Her prophesy was essentially God wanted to give me less than His best for me and I was to just accept whatever. This does not match the character of God. The Bible tells me the following:

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change, ~James 1:17.

Intimacy is vital to prophesy the heart of God. It is not speaking our thoughts and opinions. The prophets of old took seriously speaking for God. They held the revelation of God in high esteem. They were not reckless with the wisdom, insight, and words of God.

Final Notes:

What can we learn about the character of God?

  • God is holy! There is no sin in God nor does He approve of any sin.
  • God is love (sacrificial, unselfish, and perfect love). God sacrificially loves even His enemies.
  • God is just. There is no injustice in God. Sin has a penalty of death and God poured out that penalty on Jesus so whosoever repented and placed their faith in Him could be free of paying that personal penalty.
  • God is good! God does not give sloppy, worthless, awful gifts. ”So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him, ”~Matthew 7:11.
  • God is redemptive! God longs to see the world reconciled to Him. He exposes to heal and restore.
  • God is truth! God tells the truth.
  • God is faithful! If God gives His word, God will keep His word. God keeps every single promise He makes.
  • God loves the sinner! While yet sinners Jesus died for us.
  • God is after relationship! God wants to be known by us and have a personal, intimate relationship with us.
  • God is compassionate and merciful! Compassion moves us beyond feeling bad for things happening to others to doing something to help them. Jesus was moved with compassion and healed the sick. He felt their pain and was moved to do something to help them.
  • God forgives. God loves to restore and is kind to us to lead us to repentance.
  • God loves everyone, including those who hate Him. God is not prejudice, racist, elitist, sexist, nor is He only interested in Americans.
  • God desires obedience; it is better than sacrifice. God still requires something from us. Those who are lawless (have no regard for the commands of God), will not inherit His Kingdom (Matthew 7:23).
  • God is the judge. God is perfect at His execution of justice. He will judge the world.
  • God is wise. The wisdom of God far surpasses human intellect.
  • God is the giver of good gifts.
  • God wants His very best for His children.
  • God is a provider and deliverer. He moves on behalf of His children.
  • God is sovereign and reigns supreme.
  • God nurtures His children. God is not only a strong tower and defender. God refers to Himself as a mother/nurturer/teacher.
  • God is a builder and gardener.
  • God is a mentor and servant leader. Jesus said the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and give His life as a ransom.
  • God is a helper. His strength is made perfect in our weakness. God is an ezer-source of great strength.
  • God reaches low to lift others higher. Jesus showed us the Father. Jesus reached low to elevate humanity.
  • God values honor. Honor is is not agreeing with everyone about everything. It is choosing to respect someone and treat them with dignity.
  • God cares about every single detail of our lives. God cares more about His children than earthly parents care about theirs.
  • God is strategic and His timing is perfect. God does not half do things nor work sloppily. God is perfect.
  • God loves us as we are yet longs to see us grow to be the very best version of ourselves. There is nothing we can do to make God love us more or less. He also cares about every detail of our growth.
  • God is close to the broken hearted and saves those crushed in spirit. The suffering of humanity matters to God.
  • God is Spirit. God embodies the characteristics of male and female. God is not like us, we were created in His image. Though painted as male, God is not like a human male. God created both genders in His image (see Genesis 1:27).
  • God cares deeply for orphans, widows, the poor, refugees, and the outcasts. Jesus was a refugee. God cares deeply for the people society may ignore or hate.

There are certainly more things that could be written about God. I hoped to give a foundation, not complete the entire picture. We have a great invitation to know God and pursue Him. We have the opportunity to know God for ourselves. When we know God for ourselves, we are less deceived by every proclaiming representative of God.

We are also better testers of what we think we are hearing and sensing from God if we know His character. If I know His word and His character, it helps to decifer what is of God, what is from my flesh or soul, and what is from the devil.

My encouragement is to filter revelation not only through the word of God, filter through the character of God.

God help us to know you, truly know you and your character. Increase our intimacy with you and help us to know you intimately. Remove any flaws in our thinking of who you are. Clear our hearts and minds of any deception or flawed perceptions. Thank you for the opportunity to know you! In Jesus powerful name. Amen.

Love in Christ,

Erin Lamb

P.S Book 2 is scheduled to be released 7/7/2018. I hope you pick it up on Amazon or my business website https://www.empowered-free.com.

New Series (Revelation of God)

We live in a culture where there are numerous opinions of who God is and what God has said or is saying. There are internet prophets and spokespeople all claiming to know God and speak for Him. How do you discern who is truly representing God? How do you know if what you are given is truly from the heart of God or just someone’s opinion?

The greatest revealer of God was and is perfectly one with the Father. He is Jesus.

This new series will focus on revelation, testing revelation, prophecy, the spirit of prophecy, discerning, and how we grow in intimacy with God.

God invites us to know Him.

Revelation is a byproduct of intimacy. It is a connection heart to heart and spirit to spirit with God.

Revelation should bring us closer to God. When God speaks there is a purpose and reason. Every word from God is seed. Those seeds are intended to grow something, to connect us to His heartbeat, to infuse us with purpose, destiny, and guidance. Isaiah 55:11 says, “No word from shall ever fail, it accomplishes all it is sent out to do.”

It is imperative that we know His voice for ourselves and not just run after every movement that says, “God said.”

There are people teaching there is no hell and everyone goes to heaven despite their lack of love for God. This teaching is antichrist; it opposes the very teachings of Jesus who said, “Many, many will cry out to be Lord, Lord and I will reply, ‘Depart from Me. I never knew you, you who practice lawlessness.'” See Matthew 7:21-23. Jesus had direct words on eternal damnation for the unrepentant (Luke 16:19-31, Matthew 10:28, Luke 10:15, Matthew 25:46, Matthew 13:24-30, Matthew 25:41, and there are more!).

It may seem fun to follow the path of those who claim an angel showed up and told them something contrary to scripture or “God” told them something contrary to scripture and the character of God. It is not wisdom to follow anyone who violates the very teachings of Jesus and claim to be Christian.

Jesus said the following (John 14:18-26):

 “I promise that I will never leave you helpless or abandon you as orphans—I will come back to you! Soon I will leave this world and they will see me no longer, but you will see me, because I will live again, and you will come alive too.

So when that day comes, you will know that I am living in the Father and that you are one with me, for I will be living in you. Those who truly love me are those who obey my commands. Whoever passionately loves me will be passionately loved by my Father. And I will passionately love you in return and will manifest my life within you.”

Then one of the disciples named Judas (not Judas Iscariot) said, “Lord, why is it you will only reveal your identity to us and not to everyone?”

Jesus replied, “Loving me empowers you to obey my word. And my Father will love you so deeply that we will come to you and make you our dwelling place. But those who don’t love me will not obey my words. The Father did not send me to speak my own revelation, but the words of my Father. I am telling you this while I am still with you. But when the Father sends the Spirit of Holiness, the One like me who sets you free, he will teach you all things in my name. And he will inspire you to remember every word that I’ve told you.

Jesus spoke the very words of the Father. The testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy (Revelation 19:10). Jesus invites us all to know Him and the Father. Jesus invites us to know His word, His character, His nature, and His heart. The invitation of revelation is for relationship. God invites us into relationship with Him.

Over this series I am praying that you and I have profound encounters with the heart of God. I am praying we grow deeper in knowing Him intimately. I am praying we have an even greater revelation of who God is.

Thank you God for the ability to know you. Remove any cobwebs, dividing walls, deception, and distance between our hearts and yours. Take us deeper than we have been before in knowing you for who you are and not who others have made you out to be. In the powerful name of Jesus, amen.

Be blessed today! You are prayed for and deeply loved!

Warmly,

Erin Lamb

Don’t Settle

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The best relationships evolve when two people know their own worth.

God places a high value on each human being. We are called to live at peace with all people, if possible. This does not mean that we are suitable for every person. Some relationships are not the best matchup for us. We can try to force them, waste years praying for change, or use wisdom and cease settling.

I would like to break this down…

I am a direct communicator and do not enjoy games, flakiness, hot then cold, nonsense. I mean what I say. I am not unstable, flakey, nor do I play games. I am not a good fit for unstable people. I am not a great fit for grossly insecure people. I actually like who I am in Christ and have zero desire to diminish who I am to appeal to those with low self esteem. God invited me to love myself, then love my neighbor as I love myself.

I have had numerous people tell me to settle in romantic relationships and friendships. I do not wish to because of what I know of God.

Scripture tells me the following:

Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen,~Ephesians 3:20-21.

If a son asks for bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish? Or if he asks for an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask Him!”~Luke 11:11-13.

The only perfect person and perfect relationship is with Jesus. There are synergy relationships and divine alignments that bring out the best in us, not the worst. There are relationships that complement us and add value. There are relationships that are Godsends. Then there are those that seem to be aligned with hell.

If we seek God before we date, before we become best friends, before taking the job, before the business or ministry alignment-it can save us loads of heartache. Will everything be perfect, no. Can we bypass some hell on earth by asking God to align us with Ephesians 3:20 relationships, yes.

The people I know who are divorced or in abusive or not so great relationships either settled, rushed in because of peer pressure-desire for sex-age-desperation, or did not seriously seek God about their choices. Hormones are not to be trusted. God can be trusted. Lonliness is a very poor decision making tool. It is far better to be alone with God than partnered with the wrong people.

God withholds nothing good from us according to Psalm 84.

For the Lord God is a Sun and Shield; the Lord bestows [present] grace and favor and [future] glory (honor, splendor, and heavenly bliss)! No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly,~Psalm 84:11.

God is good. God withholds nothing good. If we are not seeking the manifestation of good in relationships we may either not be ready, choosing poorly, or not understanding the timing of God.

God exists outside of time and is patient. We as humans can be impatient. Impatience can lead to poor choices.

Settling for less than God’s best does not leave us fulfilled. It leaves us hungry and depleted. Dating out of lonliness or desperation can lead to devastation. Choosing someone just for physical intimacy or to meet a need is selfish. Nothing good springs from selfishness. Marrying someone just to check a box and fit into Christian culture is not prudent. Settling for crumbs does not leave us full. It leaves up empty.

God intended to meet our primary needs for love, security, identity, and intimacy. If God is first and we know who we are in Him, we will not settle for less than His most excellent best. It is not arrogance, it is alignment with what is God sent.

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is no variableness, neither shadow of turning,~James 1:17.

There are still some great men and women in the world! If a person seeks God, they can be set up by God for divine friendships, divine marriages. Why settle for what we can get on our own when God offers custom relationships?

The more we love ourselves and stand confident in who God created us to be, the more we attract people with the same confidence and value for us. Those who do not love themselves cannot love others. We attract what we believe and manifest. Manifest low self esteem, attract those with low self esteem. One of the greatest gifts is actually choosing to believe what God has said about us.

Biblical examples of divine alignments…

Johnathan and David had a divine relationship. Ruth and Naomi had a divine relationship. Ruth and Boaz had a divine marriage. Those who seek God are blessed.

Papa God I bind all settling and seeking relationships with the wrong people. Help us also to set boundaries ad see ourselves as you do. Protect each person on this blog from choosing unwisely. Heal soul wounds from bad choices and bad relationships. Help each one not to settle for less than your most excellent best! Set up divine appointments for your best friendships, best relationships. Highlight destiny people and destiny relationships. Block the counterfeits. In Jesus powerful name, Jesus.

Leadership, Godly Submission, and Jesus

Morning Devotion: Leader means servant in God’s eyes, not dictator or boss. Dissecting the leadership model of Jesus and wrong teachings on submission. Submit=Be willing to yield to what honors God (possess humility), not obey or blindly obey people.

I am sometimes confused when people state they are the leader when their function is simply being served and telling others what to do. They are exalted and they have a hierarchy system so their needs, desires, wishes are served or met. Or they define great leadership by the number of people following them; Hitler had lots of followers under his demonic leadership it did not mean God thought he was a great leader.

I have had men tell me and women too that the husband is the leader in the family yet the wife does 80-90% of the serving, helping, loving, getting low in humility to empower her family. It is not the model Jesus laid out nor lived of leadership.

The one laying their life down, sacrificially loving, and serving is imitating Jesus and leading.

The disciples at one point became self important and argued over who would be the greatest among them. The desire to be great in the eyes of man is of the carnal nature (flesh).

Pride does not flow from God, it flows from Satan. Pride, self importance, was the principle sin of Lucifer. He wanted to be worshipped and exalted above God. Lucifer wanted to be served, not serve.

This was the response of Jesus to the arguing disciples:

Jesus, knowing their thoughts, called them to his side and said, “Kings and those with great authority in this world rule oppressively over their subjects, like tyrants. But this is not your calling. You will lead by a completely different model. The greatest one among you will live as the one who is called to serve others, because the greatest honor and authority is reserved for the one with the heart of a servant. For even the Son of Man did not come expecting to be served by everyone, but to serve everyone, and to give his life in exchange for the salvation of many,”~Matthew 20:25-28.

Jesus came with an upside down model of leadership. He came and served. He came and washed feet. He came and empowered others. He came and died to free others. He came and got low so we could be seated in heavenly places with Him, joint heirs and copartners. The value Jesus placed and places on humanity is high.

Jesus was and is perfect-He is the model for all things Christian. He selected disciples who were not yet enlightened. He walked with them, talked with them, served them, and empowered them to do what they saw Him doing. Great leadership is empowering others to reach their highest potential. Jesus did not show up and say, “Now look here peasants, God created you for Me so let’s get this straight, when I say jump, you say how high. These are my demands, meet them daily or else.”

Jesus had no pride, ego, or what they call male ego. Knowing He was worthy of worship, He got low and served others.

Phillipians tells us the following about following the example of Jesus:

Be free from pride-filled opinions, for they will only harm your cherished unity. Don’t allow self-promotion to hide in your hearts, but in authentic humility put others first and view others as more important than yourselves. Abandon every display of selfishness. Possess a greater concern for what matters to others instead of your own interests. And consider the example that Jesus, the Anointed One, has set before us. Let his mindset become your motivation.

The Example of Jesus Christ

He existed in the form of God, yet he gave no thought to seizing equality with God as his supreme prize. Instead he emptied himself of his outward glory by reducing himself to the form of a lowly servant. He became human! He humbled himself and became vulnerable, choosing to be revealed as a man and was obedient. He was a perfect example, even in his death—a criminal’s death by crucifixion!~Phillipians 2:3-8.

Love is destroyed by pride. Love and pride cannot occupy the same spaces. One will dominate and overpower the other. God commissions and empowers us to love. So when someone says, “I am called to lead you,” if they are following Jesus this means, “I am called to serve you, not seek to be served by you.”

I have met numerous “leaders” and men in my day who told me they were called to lead me. Yet what that meant was they felt empowered to tell me what to do and wanted to be served. This is NOT godly leadership at all, it’s worldly leadership.

I have had single men tell me all the ways I could benefit their lives because to them a wife is servant to meet their needs. They could have cared less about loving me, treating me the way Jesus would. My dreams, calling from God, desires were completely insignificant. They saw someone unmarried and pretty (their words not mine) they wanted to purchase (flash their money, paycheck at) to serve them.

Women are not objects or slaves to be purchased to serve the whims of men then be replaced when she fails to meet a need, cheated on when she cannot meet his pleasures, or used for her body. God did NOT create a system of selfishness nor objectification. God created a family that is supposed to be fueled by love. God says, “Husbands forsake all others and cleave to your one wife. Love her the way Jesus loves the church. He was willing to die for the church. Jesus got low and served. Jesus empowers and leads by love and example. Jesus walks in purity not lust. Jesus cares about every single detail…follow My Son Jesus. Be an imitator of Him.”

The verse that says wives be subject to your husbands as unto the Lord in the original text means be wholly devoted in love-this means she is monogymous and not enganged with other lovers, she has eyes for her husband, single vision. It does NOT mean he becomes her god and she must obey him.

Husband is not the same as God. If it were so, then God is the author of confusion because He plainly says, “You shall have no other god besides me,” and “You are a slave to whomever you obey.” If the texts about husbands and wives meant the husband has the final authority, if he told his wife to betray God she would have to obey her spouse over God. No! She will be held accountable to God for obeying God not man. God is the final authority.

Example:

In inner healing class we had a lady who’s husband was molesting his granddaughter. The wife was submitting to his perverted leadership and holding a pillow over the child’s head during the violation. Was she honoring her husband by submitting to his perversion? Was she a good wife? No! She was a bad wife. She will spend a long time in jail like him for harming this child. The lady who was molested over and over was a testimony of healing in the class, her grandparents were not in the class.

Part of intimate relationship is revealing the righteousness of God to those connected to us. Her role as his wife and sister in Christ was to point her husband to righteousness. We do not yield to what is ungodly. No no no no! Ephesians 5:21 tells all followers of Jesus to be willing to yield (submit, possess humility) in reverence for the Lord. Being willing to yield is NOT the same word as obey.

Culture focuses on the wife submitting while ignoring the verse before it that says men and women, all believers submit to each other and choose humility. Culture also ignores the verses that tell husbands to go even further than that to love their wives the way Jesus loves the church (die to selfishness, pride, ego, immorality). Point highlighted again, we are NOT to yield to what is ungodly and violates our relationship with God. Nor are we puppets to be led on strings by whims of others.

Those led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. If your boss at work, pastor, mentor, parent, spouse or anyone claiming authority over you tells you to do something wicked, say no. That is not rebellion, it is honoring God. Godly leaders point to what honors the Lord and people. God will not lead anyone into sin, nor is God a slave driver who does not care about the needs, desires, or dreams of those He leads.

May we lead like Jesus which is counter cultural to this world. The greatest in the Kingdom of God has a heart of a servant, it is one who loves and looks out for the best interests of others.

Papa God help us to see leadership through the lenses of Jesus. You gave us a perfect model in your Son. Jesus was not a bully, dictator, abuser, nor did He use His status to Lord over people. He got low and served. He took the lowest place and you exalted Him to the highest place. Jesus is perfect theology. Jesus is the perfect spouse model. Jesus is the perfect leader; He seeks to look out for the best interests of those connected to Him. Jesus perfectly loves. Jesus does not use people He partners with them. Jesus, beautiful Jesus. May we abide in Jesus and lead like Jesus. In Your powerful name, amen.

Love in Christ,

Erin Lamb

Breaking Cycles of Dysfunction in Relationships (Single and Following Jesus Series Part IX)

Have you been in a cycle of repeated bad relationships or you see your friends in those same dysfunctional relationships? Today is a day of breaking free.

I have asked the same questions about friendships or casual relationships, “Why is this type of person attracted to me? They have no qualities that match up.” That may seem harsh yet let me give some examples for clarity.

My nature is encouraging, supportive, and I pursue kindness. I want to see you win. I will be the most vocal cheerleader for you.

I wondered why those who were negative, critical, mean spirited, unsupportive, and hateful were drawn to me and why they turned their negativity on me.

I am going to tell you why. Are you ready?

1. Opposites Sometimes Do Attract.

You may be giving and attract a taker. You may be kind and attract someone rude. It is not always true that we attract who we are. You may be loving and attract someone critical, rude, mean.

2. Poor Boundaries.

People treat us the way we let them treat us. Some see meekness (strength under control) as weakness. If we do not set a boundary, “You may not treat me that way, you may not talk to me that way, no this is not okay,” then we invite disrespect. It’s a conversation that must start early, not months into the relationship.

I had a lady tell me once (long ago), “I know no matter how bad I treat you, you will always be there for me.” I thought to myself, “What kind of crazy have I signed up for.”

Loving someone does not mean you let them treat you poorly. That is called enabling. It is a form of codependency. Some think God is this way. He is not. His love does not change. He is not cheering when we misbehave. God sets boundaries-“If you do this, this is the result.” God allows natural consequences. He does not remove every consequence this side of heaven.

So with this lady, I pulled back from being her default when she had no boyfriend, the person who answered her calls in crisis. I removed myself from being a doormat under the umbrella of false love.

More examples:

I have an associate who is negative. This person loves to complain and focus on what is wrong. It drains me. I told the person this week, “I would love when we talk for it to be about something positive, goals, good things. What’s going right? There is enough crazy in the world, let’s be the change we wish to see.” I set a boundary. Please keep your constant complaining in your yard. Do I love this person, yes. Do I want to listen to hours of doom, gloom, negativity, gossip, he said/she said…no. I am not a garbage can.

I had a gentleman pursuing me who always wanted to wait until the last minute to set dates. I told him I would appreciate advance notice (not all the time-yet it was considerate to give others notice); texting me Friday afternoon to meet Friday night is a no go for constant meet ups. I set a boundary. He did not listen. So often he’d texted on Friday or Saturday afternoon and I was busy.

My female friend said it was a game to see if I was seeing other people. I am an adult. I only play games with actual children. Some may have thought that was cute. I did not. Maybe if we were a couple and had been dating awhile, yet not for someone I do not know well this was a no go and setting dates signifies value. Yes, be spontaneous…Also take the time to plan something. Gentlemen say, “I would love to see you Friday night, do you have plans?” That conversation happens before Friday. I am not clearing every weekend hoping a guy messages me. I have things to do.

If you make yourself so available to everyone, they will treat you like you have no value. If you do not value your time, value yourself, why should they? I am not saying play hard to get nor play games. I am saying if you do not respect and value your own time, others will not either.

Place God at the center. Would God want me treated this way? If not, why are you allowing it? How much time do I need to invest in this relationship? How much of my heart can they steward well? God knows.

If you have poor or low boundaries, then you will find disorder and dysfunction and poor treatment.

3. Quick to Trust and Dismissing Relational Red Flags.

I consider myself trustworthy. Therefore, I give people the benefit of the doubt. I have learned to pay attention. Watch people. Watch how they treat people. Watch how they talk about others. Do they tell everyone else’s business? They are not trustworthy with your business. Do they only show up when they need something? You are most likely a convenience. Do you make all the effort? You are in a one sided relationship. If they destroy others, do not think they will not do it to you.

Many times red flags are ignored under the, “I am a loving Christian.” Okay, be a loving Christian with wisdom. Wisdom says, “Bad company corrupts good character.” Wisdom says, “How can two be joined unless they agree?” Wisdom says, “Do not make partners with an angry person.” These are all in the Bible right along with love your neighbor. You can love someone without dating them, being close friends, being business or ministry partners, or marrying them.

One of my favorite quotes by Maya Angelou is as follows, “When people show you who they are, believe them.” Unless they want to change or God changes them, that is what you are dealing with in a partner or friend.

4. You Are Pulling All the Relational Weight

I love giving. I love giving with no expectation of return. Yet there is wisdom required in giving as well. Too much time spent together, too much closeness without commitment, too much investment without any investment back is a set up for dysfunction.

Jesus loves perfectly and in exchange for our freedom He gave His life. When we enter into covenant, God asks for our life. Please understand God is not just giving, giving, giving and expecting nothing. He asks for our entire lives. It’s a bigger commitment than an earthly marriage.

This thought that selfless giving is to lead to one sided relationships is not covenant love. Relationships were designed to be give and take. If one person is doing all the work, it’s not love. Both people are to pursue the best interests of the other.

I have seen overgiving lead to abuse; it attracts narcissists and abusive people. Why? They thrive on taking. Selfless givers with no boundaries are easy targets.

A person who loves you will want to bless you too.

I have met so many people angry because they trusted too quickly, fell in love with the idea of someone, ignored red flags, and were burned poorly in a relationship. If you pay attention, people show you who they are. Their mouth speaks what their heart is full of and their actions, if you watch closely, manifest their heart and how they feel about you.

Placing God at the center can save us loads of heartache.

God help me to choose the right associates, friends, confidants, mate. Help me to set godly boundaries and respect those of others. I want to be the best friend I can be to someone and want that in return. Help me to not only be a blessing, but to cease settling for less than what you would offer. Break every cycle of dysfunction in my life and relationships. The common denominator is me. Show me what I am allowing or the poor or low boundaries. Help me to stay centered in you and have the best relationships possible. God help me to be healthy in my soul and attract and maintain relationships with healthy people. Jesus break cycles of dysfunction and it starts with me. Change me so I guard my heart and live out of wisdom and love! In Jesus powerful name.

Pursue Jesus and Use Wisdom (Single & Following Jesus Series Part VIII)

For the Lord God is a Sun and Shield; the Lord bestows [present] grace and favor and [future] glory (honor, splendor, and heavenly bliss)! No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly,~Psalm 84:11.

“Get [skillful and godly] wisdom! Acquire understanding [actively seek spiritual discernment, mature comprehension, and logical interpretation]!

Do not forget nor turn away from the words of my mouth. Do not turn away from her (Wisdom) and she will guard and protect you;

Love her, and she will watch over you,”~Proverbs 4:5-6.

Wisdom is so vital in all of life.

Believers are encouraged to follow Jesus and acquire wisdom. The pursuit of wisdom is not for demonic wisdom; the wisdom of this age is not always in alignment with God.

Godly wisdom is pure, full of truth, love, and has the best interests of everyone involved considered. Godly wisdom is holy; it is without sin.

Our culture promotes immorality and sensuality. It is ungodly. The movies and tv promote immorality without ever truly showing the depths of the consequences for immoral choices.

Our culture also promotes the lie that sex or marriage will complete a person.

As stated last post, casual sex is promoted. Not only is casual sex promoted so is love at first sight, magical/mystical/over romanced/over sexualized relationships. Many of these relationships disregard wisdom, true God love, or God’s truths. They sound good, may look good, yet they do not hold onto goodness as you fast forward to when reality sets into the picture.

Ex: Henry and Julie who fell in love find out a year later after the honeymoon period is over that they have nothing in common that’s not physical, they the thrill is gone, they fight over money, they hate each other’s families, and they are miserable. This scenario rarely makes it to the big screen. Henry and Julie maybe pursued lust/feelings over wisdom and love. Then we see them break up (if unmarried) or divorce.

Follow Jesus:

Jesus is love, therefore pursuing God is pursuing love. God helps us to love ourselves and others. When God is first, the voids in our lives are filled by God. We then make decisions out of unselfish, sacrificial love not lust (which is about pleasing self), selfishness, desperation, or loneliness. God fills all the empty places so we enter relationships prepared to give, not with our hands out to receive or be made whole by an imperfect human. Only God can completely fill the voids of the soul and spirit. God solidifies identity, not a mate.

When God is first, He can bring in an equal complement/companion. Otherwise there may be a temptation to pursue a match that is less that God’s best. There are no perfect people, there are God matches that are better together than apart.

Wisdom says, “Will the relationship add value for both people? Is God at the center? Can we grow together? Is there mutual effort? Are we headed the same direction? How does this person handle life, conflict, money? Would God or my close friends/family choose this person for me? Is this person even interested in a lifelong partnership with me? Can we be allies? Are we friends?

If things do not work out, are we leaving the person in better shape than they were before they met us? Or are they in need of deep inner healing after connecting to us? Seriously think about what you bring to the table. Is it good? Does it add value?

The people who engage in sex outside of marriage are robbing a future spouse of intimacy with that person and their own future spouse. The one who engages in pornography is robbing themselves of deep intimacy and understanding of what God intended with sex. His design was always about love; unselfish, committed, holy, powerful, intimate, sacrificial love. The devil invites people to cheapen the most intimate act between a man and woman.

Love is willing to slow down and pray. Love is willing to evaluate the situation and relationship with God. Love wants to keep God in first place. Love pursues purity. Love is willing to set boundaries that offer protection of both people. Love is who God is.

Pursue Wisdom:

Let’s venture into another part of process, pursuing wisdom. I have met many people hurt because they forsook wisdom.

Ex: Susie likes John so she starts having dreams that he is the one. Obviously God speaks in dreams, so she should grab ahold to that dream and start planning their wedding in her head (not wisdom). Hit the mega pause button. I have seen women do this and ignore the actions of John. John is a jerk and mistreats everyone, yet there is this dream/prophetic word-so Susie holds on for dear life only to find out later John never wanted to marry her, or worse they get married and he’s an abuser.

Red Alert: Every dream, vision, prophetic word needs tested. Every single one. Do not just run with a “word” or “impression” or “dream” without testing it to see if it’s truly God. I do not care who the prophet was who gave that word, it needs tested and confirmed. The devil speaks and can invade dreams, impressions, visions.

If you think you heard from God about someone, pray and put that word on the shelf. I recommend praying, “God show me who this person really is,” and watching them. How do they treat you? Do you always initiate contact? Do they invest in you at all? How does being with this person impact your life? Are you constantly confused about where you stand with that person? Are they controlling, mean, unloving? Do they treat you with love, respect, honor?

Too many times people fall for who they want someone to be instead of who they really are. Would you let your best friend marry someone like the person you are interested in? If not, why are you in that relationship?

I have seen women chase men like they are Jesus then end up disappointed they are rejected. Relationships are not mean to be like the animal kingdom; chase, pursue, conquer. They are supposed to be about love. Love involves mutual pursuit.

Evaluate your relationship:

Is your relationship life giving? Or are you in tears or upset most of the time? God wants His very best for you, for everyone. God ordained matchups still have challenges, they should not be loaded with confusion, uncertainty, abuse, pain, and suffering.

I have also seen both men and women cling to the idea that someone loves them or is interested in them who will not commit to them nor express their intentions.

Ex: Karla has been into Jerry for years. Jerry flirts and is nice yet has never asked her on a date, never expressed interest, and does nothing to initiate contact or getting to know each other. Karla is convinced his flirting when he sees her is more than it is.

I work in a predominately male environment and they have told me, “We flirt because it’s fun. It makes us feel good.” Therefore there is no intention of a relationship. For the unsaved person there may be an intention of a hook up, but not marriage or a serious relationship.

Get Wisdom! Ask for discernment.

“Discernment is more than the ability to differentiate between right and wrong. It is the ability to differentiate between right and almost right.”

Wisdom looks at the future as well as the present. Wisdom prays and seeks godly counsel. Wisdom is a life preserver. Wisdom says, “Where is God in this situation? Are we are good match? Spiritually are we on the same page? Can we grow together? Is this someone God would choose for me? Are my God expectations on this person when they should be on God? How does this person treat people, including me? Does this person demonstrate any of the fruit of the Spirit?”

Papa God I pray every unmarried person pursues Jesus and wisdom. I bind any spirits of impatience, deception, selfishness, lust, false dreams/false prophecies, and declare soul health. Come Lord Jesus and fill every soul with your love, peace, joy, and purity. Fill every person to overflowing. Impart godly wisdom and truth. Help each person make wise decisions about relationships. Prepare each person for what you have for them. Heal all past relational wounding, in Jesus powerful name. Amen.

Response to Why Are You Still Single? (Single & Following Jesus Part V)


Aloha friends, 

So one of the frequent questions given to singles is “Why are you single?” It might be followed by a, “You are so beautiful/handsome. You are such a great person,” or a “Let me set you up with my (coworker, friend, this person I know, or a complete stranger).” 

Sometimes the person is unbelieveably rude and says something like, “I am so glad I found someone,” or “You better get moving the clock is ticking.” 

I had a lady tell me once she could never be me because I did not have anyone. Well, she was soon single. Her husband was caught cheating. As a matter of fact every woman who has looked down on me for being single ended up divorced/betrayed. No, I did not wish bad things on them. 

Their comments do not bother me. Why? I truly like who I am. With or without a mate, I like myself. A partner is not a means to validate my self worth. 

Some pity you. Some judge you. Some try to set you up on awful blind dates. Some assume all you do is think about marriage. There are healthy ways to deal. 

How do you deal? 

Well, offense is an option or a snarky comment. Don’t let the spirit of slap get you. 😉


The high road is understanding being single is not a curse nor will marriage fix everything. Marriage adds responsibilities, involves compromise, and is best suited for two people ready to attempt to love unselfishly. 

Paul stated very clearly that the married person focuses on their spouse while the single person has undivided focus on God. 

I really want to get married, what do I do? 

I enjoy being single, except at weddings and around certain people. Then I wish I had a fake spouse to bypass the akwardness. 🙂 Yet I know it is a great desire in the hearts of many. So here are some tidbits. 

1. Get comfy with who you are

Confidence attracts great things. 

Being single can cause some insecurity for some-the world is wondering why no one has chosen you. You may wonder this too. Yet know there are plenty of people married to the wrong person or in hellish marriages because they were impatient. They post like it’s bliss on Social Media, yet know of several faking the funk per say. 

The right thing for a person at the wrong time is still the wrong thing. 

2. Know God cares about the desires of your heart and His abilities trump a biological clock. 

I know people who married later in life and have amazing marriages. They had kids over 40, had the income to support those kids, and were mature enough to handle the marriage. When God gives gifts, they are custom. Custom gifts are not always quick or immediate. One can go create an Ishmael situation or wait on God/seek God for Issac. 

But my biological clock is like a time bomb! 

Abraham and Sarah are prime examples of God’s ability to defy biology. God created the body. God can do what people say cannot be done. I know most do not want their story to be that of Abraham and Issac. I simply wanted to encourage you that God is not limited. 

The desires of a person’s heart placed in the hands of God is the safest place they can be. 

3. Ask why you want to be married?

Selfishness is the thief of love, God love. If marriage is a means to fit in, fill a void, forgo lonliness, or deal with lust-those are the wrong motives. 

Marriage amplifies who a person is. Any issues hidden come bubbling up. What if that spouse get’s disfigured, can not meet physical needs, gets an illness…what then? What if for better or worse becomes the worse? If the objective is not to unselfishly love and honor someone for life, well relational breakdown occurs. 

4. Pray

There are people who say pray for your future spouse. I am not opposed to this. I truly think some of the greatest prayers are below…

Lord help me to find contentment in you alone. 

Lord purify my heart and help me to walk in purity. 

Lord show me how to love like you. 

Lord prepare me for what you have for me. 

Lord help me to guard my heart. 

Lord help me to steward others hearts well. 

Lord give me wisdom and increased discernment. 

Lord fill all the voids with you. 

Lord heal my soul. 

Lord protect me from the wrong choices. 

Lord hold my heart and do not let me give it to the wrong person. 

Lord prepare the person you have for me. Cause our paths to cross at the perfect time. 

Lord help me to find my identity in you. 

Lord strengthen me where I am weak.


Final thoughts…

People are getting married later in life. I hear from ladies that Christian men do not pursue them. I hear from Christian guys they are clueless how to date or have been repeadily rejected. So this leaves an interesting dynamic for those desiring children. Some opt for online dating. I have seen this work out great for many and not so great for a few. Some pray and hope God sends someone. Some give up all together. 

I will say that God is good and withholds nothing good. God’s timing is not always ours. Yet I have seen over and over the faithfulness of God. May knowing God be the aim. Those who seek first the Kingdom will gain so much more. The greatest gift is God! 

Praying for you! God wants His very best for you, for all of us. 

Love, 

Erin Lamb