You are loved!
Today I wanted to chat with you about needs. We, as humans, have needs. Those needs left unmet can lead to soul wounds, despair, discouragement, hurt, unhealthy relationships, or addictions.
What are our basic needs. Well, other than food and water, we need:
- Family (does not have to be natural)
- Sense of Belonging
- Unconditional, unselfish, sacrificial (Agape) Love: we were created by love, to be loved, and to love.
God is the primary Source of these things. If we bypass Him to try to get those needs met by others, well it brings problems. God loves purely. There is no bias.
God is stable, consistent, and will not love you today and withhold love tomorrow. God comes to give and not consume. God comes with a heart of pure unconditional, sacrificial, and lavish love.
People, substances, and things were never created to replace our need for God. When they replace Him, unhealthy habits, and unhealthy relationships form. It also leads to great disappointment.
In our culture we have people looking for love in all the wrong places, with all the wrong faces, in an attempt to fill a void only God can fill.
So how do we deal? The world offers so many opportunities to get needs met in unhealthy ways. God offers healthy ways.
- Start with God.
- Seek healthy community
- Set boundaries for weaknesses
God tells us the following in His word.
- Mt 6:8…”your Father knows the things you have need of before you ask Him.”
- Ps 34:10…”…those who seek the Lord shall not lack any good thing.”
- Ps 24:1…”The earth is the Lord’s, and all it’s fullness,…”
- Ps 50:10…”…every beast of the forest is Mine, and the cattle on a thousand hills.”
- Gen 18:14…”Is anything too hard for the Lord?”
- Mt 7:7…”Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.”
- Rom 8:32…”He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall he not with Him also freely give us all things?”
The love God has for us is pure, genuine, overflowing, and good.
He is available 24/7 to provide love, encouragement, hope, joy, peace, and His goodness. He provides affirmation, healing, and affection.
When we start with God we have a better idea of what genuine love is and what it is not. When we start with God, we leave full and have something to offer others. We enter relationships not out of great need, but to be a blessing.
We were designed to live and thrive in community. Community provides an outlet for family. God’s design was for everyone to have a family. Unfortunately our culture has models of brokeness. Some people are not loved by their natural families.
God designed the Body of Christ to be a source of family for people. We are still working out the kinks of family in church, yet that was God’s design.
Pray for God to place you in a family if you do not have one. He excels at divine connections.
Family provides a safe place for some of those needs. A God given family is a blessing.
Where do you turn when there is a need? To food, alcohol, the internet, a person? Knowing your triggers helps to prevent sin. If I know I am feeling down, where do I turn? God or people?
I have found people are nice, but sometimes they make me feel worse. They offer scripture bandaids that often are not helpful. Or they have zero compassion or offer judgement. Or they blow me off because they are concerned about themselves. So, for the most part, I go to God. My boundary is set with “I will spend time with God, not seek help from people.”
There are times I will solicite help from people, yet many learning bumps later I have seen and continue to see my best bet is God.
Your boundary may be different. It may be, “When I am hurting or in need, I turn to this person or thing.” You may need to set a boundary of, “I will not seek to connect with anyone before I connect with God.”
You and I were designed for intimacy (knowing others and being known). We were created to be loved, affirmed, encouraged, and to have affection. Those needs are normal. The way we get those needs met is what leads us on a path of purity or unhealthy living.
I bless you friends. You are prayed for and deeply loved.
Love in Christ,